I’m not one to stir up controversy. Ah, who am I kidding? Sometimes I love nothing more than to stir up controversy. I actually wasn’t going to mention this after one article I read but after reading several articles with the same opinion I have no choice but to comment. I need to speak up for all those guys in the friend zone who don’t have a platform. The consensus among several female writers seems to be as follows. If a guy is in love with a woman but he’s in the friend zone and he dotes on her and treats her like a queen in hopes that she will one day return those feelings he’s simply doing these things to get sex as a reward or he believes he’s deserving of her affection because of them.
Pump the brakes.
A man trying to win a woman’s affection by being nice is now somehow being perceived as predatory sexual behavior? My, oh my, this generation is in trouble. In 1950, this was called having a crush or being love sick. Today it’s an accusation of being conniving and deceiving. Let me say this, any man who bends over backwards for a woman who only considers him a friend is deeply in love. It has exactly zero to do with sex. I’m about to drop a bomb on the ladies who share this opinion. It’s not as easy for us to get sex as it is for you but it’s not decoding the Matrix either. No man who isn’t in love is doting on a woman under any circumstances. It’s a little nuts that something as pure as actually putting some effort into trying to get a woman to like you is being looked down upon. Do you think any man who wasn’t completely smitten with a woman would sit around and listen to her talk about every guy but him? All he’s doing is showing her what she could have if she ever decides to come around, a good guy who would legitimately have her back. Where’s the wrong there? There are no bad endings here. If she never returns those feeling is he going to flip out on her? Of course not, he loves her. The worst case scenario here is one heartbroken guy. And, not for nothing here, but if a guy in the friend zone is exhibiting these behaviors and the woman knows there is no chance she could ever develop feelings for him then can’t she cut it off in no uncertain terms? Sure, it’ll hurt and she’ll seem like the bad guy for a minute but isn’t it better than keeping the poor guy around? To these writers I say, doesn’t this man who is pining over a woman deserve a little respect? I don’t agree with what he’s doing as he’s being taken advantage of but I respect the fact that he’s in love and I respect the fact that he’s trying. There’s no need for name calling here.